


melty cheese

by zero



Category: Lucky Star (Manga), Lucky Star - All Media Types
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-28
Updated: 2016-11-28
Packaged: 2018-09-02 19:31:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8680627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zero/pseuds/zero
Summary: tsukasa and konata have some burger time





	

konata: *lighting up*  
konata: well, ive finally done it again  
konata: ive kicked my own ass with bountiful herbs. tell no one of this  
day  
konata: it didnt have to be this way  
pillow: *silence*  
konata: my girlfriend lets me keep a body pillow of an anime lady.  
she tolerates all of my quirks. i truley live a charmed life  
konata: what do you think, yoko from gurren lagann? what of diseases  
of the spirit *cracking up*  
konata: *watching cartoons* fuck. fuck. willie whopper is in trouble.  
stomach: *stomach snarling*  
willie whopper on the tv: *turning into a hamburger*  
konata: thats a bad sign! thats a bad sign! fuck!  
konata: *looks outside* dads not home. better dial out

tsukasa: *painting nails, the phone rings and she gives it that look*  
konata: hey tsukasa  
tsukasa: what  
konata: want to um  
konata: make like  
konata: make a  
konata: burgr  
tsukasa: yeah ill take you for a snack run its not like i was doing  
anything.  
tsukasa: but what if i was? what then?  
konata: willie whopper is in hell tsukasa  
tsukasa: oh is he

konata (vo): i run my fingers through my own hair feeling each and every  
thread as i contemplate my next move. im fully dressed and wearing gray  
cotton cutoffs and my panda tank. i cant make it across the room at my  
current level of hand-eye coordination. the herb has made me sleepy

konata: *getting into car* hey babe  
tsukasa: rude... bitch  
konata: hows your twin doing  
tsukasa: your girlfriend is asleep on our couch. a more important  
question is, hows willie  
konata: who the fuck is willie  
tsukasa: hows raggedy ann  
konata: shhhhhh *groping her own face* shhh  
tsukasa: hahaha  
konata: raggedy ann  
tsukasa: why didnt you invite me!  
konata: car  
tsukasa: okay were going to burger king and then we can hang out by the  
train yard and you can share  
konata: i will give you  
konata: mids  
konata: and you will buy my hamburger  
tsukasa: deal

theyre parked in the driveway of the burger king eating their hamburgers  
sign clearly visible behind them. lighting all cherry and the logo is  
in plain view. its 10 miles out past the edge of town.

konata: willie is a good kid who gets into trouble with satan. he tells  
us his story in hindsight. it was made during the prohibition era and  
was about how people who broke prohibition laws were going to hell  
tsukasa: *chewing* im listening  
konata: raggedy ann is one of those chuck jones filler specials oriented  
around a holiday.  
tsukasa: you said a dog had a skateboard in it!  
konata: yeah! i did! holy shit look at the size of that bird

a large pelican perched on the hood of tsukasas car

both, in awe: whoa what the fuck

konata: idk why i like cartoons and weed so much or what makes them a  
good combination  
tsukasa: it must be the liveliness and ambience of the animation  
combined with the colors and vapidity of the subject matter.  
konata: you said it *takes a slurp from her beverage*  
tsukasa: shes getting over being sick and she wishes youd spend more  
time with her  
konata: tsukasa... im like an onion over here  
tsukasa: like shrek  
konata: im totally shrek! i have like dimensions and shit *waving arms  
in a weird fashion*  
tsukasa: and so you need me to take you to burger king  
konata: okay now you see thats  
tsukasa: dad  
tsukasa: i either mid  
konata: no! dont say it!  
tsukasa: or i feed  
konata: *konata noises*

tsukasa drives them over by the train yard and the trains all sound like  
sad dinosaurs when they pull out. she idles in the parking lot in a  
place where itll look like shes leaving it there overnight so a security  
guard wont call on it and get it towed or worse, call the police.

all the lights in the city at night twinkle. its still kind of a small  
town but in 7 years their little hamlet has gotten bigger.

konata: tsukasa i could have had a life with her  
tsukasa: haha what are you talking about  
konata: im not gonna break up with her but i really think i should  
though because i need to be my own person and im not really good for  
anyone either  
tsukasa: thats such bullshit i see you two together you weirdo  
konata: thats like what i need to hear right now  
tsukasa: what is it about the cheese in the big king that makes it worth  
going to the kind of fast food 'staurant youd normally never go to like  
burger king  
konata: the cheese in the big king is my very best friend, uwu *emoting*  
tsukasa: she loves you too you know  
konata: why do you gotta be her intermediary like that  
tsukasa: i like snack runs or i wouldnt be doing this  
konata: the snack run is a celebrated cultural institution of the  
hiiragi family and i recognize and respect that

konata: *sighing, blowing out joint smoke that trails off into the night  
sky* i just wish i didnt feel like such a parasite to have you listen  
tsukasa: what if i want to be the enabler friend that gets dragged along  
for snack runs, however.  
konata: or rather, what if this isnt about kagamin, but about food. you  
down to raid the 7-11  
tsukasa: you arent in shape to, but ill get us slurpees and those mini  
donuts they have. its basically a glorified snack shop these days i mean  
konata: you should get monster energy drinks and those crumbly hostess  
donettes i mean  
tsukasa: hell yeah

hours later theyre both watching cartoons on konatas couch. snack  
wrappings are piled up around them.

tsukasa: your dads not coming home tonight is he  
konata: im so glad  
konata: like  
konata: ugghhhhh im glad hes finally mostly out of my life. he might  
buy a house in another suburb even. he sold a good portion of his  
collection  
tsukasa: you told me  
konata: hes got a whole new lease on life hes got a girlfriend now  
tsukasa: that must feel so  
konata: tsukasa  
konata: have i become my father. please tell me this  
tsukasa: *cracking up laughing*  
konata: *cracking up laughing*  
tsukasa: calm your fuck down and stop acting like this is a date  
konata: im pathetic and now it looks like im trying to score with  
my girlfriends sister  
tsukasa: honey  
tsukasa: take some deep breaths and try to empty your mind of everything  
except for michigan j frog

michigan j frog, on the tv in the room with them: HELLO MY BABY HELLO  
MY HONEY HELLO MY RAGTIME GIRL

both: thats the stuff!  
tsukasa: anyways im gonna crash. should i take the couch or  
konata: yeah ill get you a pillow. we should do this more often.  
tsukasa: youre not a clone and i derive ironic satisfaction out of being  
a doormat but you should be careful big sis doesnt try to horn in on  
your shrek time  
konata: yikes!  
konata: melty cheese  
tsukasa: melty cheese


End file.
